So What’s The Deal About Herpes?

No, really. You need to talk to your doctor about what actually happens.

I just spent my last post bashing herpes. I shouldn’t be doing that. I mean whiles it is a horribly painful virus, but it is also literally just a skin irritation. People shouldn’t be made to feel ashamed or embarrassed to be infected by the virus. It’s almost impossible to avoid. As I said in my last post, 1 in 6 people have it, ages 14-49. And even if you are safe and use a condom you can still contract the virus.

First off, a little health lesson. There are two different types of herpes: Type 1 and Type 2. Type 1, otherwise known as a cold sore, is what every man, woman and child seem to have, or you know, least 80% of them. Type 2 is more serious, and more painful. And if you have it, you can have an outbreak anywhere on your body, not exclusively on your genitals. Herpes can come in many different forms. The most common forms are warts and/or lesions.

I’ve alway been paranoid about catching STI’s. I’ve researched a lot and have asked many of my doctors over the years and they all say the same thing. Herpes isn’t a big deal. Don’t get me wrong, the pain can be debilitating during an outbreak, but it goes away.

I’ve asked if oral herpes, aka cold sores, can be transferred to your genitals, from you lover’s mouth. I’ve even asked, “What if you have a cold sore, and you go down on your partner and they proceed to go inside of you? Can you give yourself herpes?”

The answer I got was this: It’s completely possible to contract a cold sore on your genitals. However the chances are incredibly slim. It is much easier to transfer the virus via genital to genital contact or mouth to mouth contact. If you do happen to contract oral herpes on your nether regions, don’t fret. The first outbreak can be terrible, but nowhere near as terrible as Type 2. Also, there’s a very slim chance you’ll have another breakout ever again.

Another thing about having a cold sore down there, if you have sex, there’s almost no chance to give it to your partner’s genitals. Chances are they already have a cold sore in their mouth anyway, so they should be safe. The virus is already in their system.

Things to think about: Even if you haven’t had an out-break in years, you can give the virus, Type 2, to your current partner before the out-break, or right before anything starts to show or hurt. So when you have a new partner, I recommend telling that person what they are risking by sleeping with you. It’s their right to know what could happen with their body and decline the risk if they want to.

Type 1 carriers, who had an out-break on their genitals in the past should be able to choose to tell the partner if they are infected by the virus in that region. There is a next to nothing chance that it can be passed to your partner’s genital, so if you don’t want to put yourself through that embarrassment then you don’t have to. Those words came straight from my doctors mouth when I asked her about that hypothetical scenario. However, if you really do love and trust you’re partner, then tell them. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s just a cold sore after all. You’re partner should love all of you, warts and all (pun intended).

Condoms: Why we need them beyond the risk of pregnancy

You know you really should be using them 100% of the time. Except, for when you know…

Condoms. You know what really bothers me about condoms? How people are always like, “Oh we don’t have to use one, I’m one the pill!” Um, what about STI’s. Did you totally forget about that? They do still exist. And with how many people still refrain from using condoms, STI’s are even more prevalent.

Let’s be smart people. Condoms are good. Condoms are your friend. I understand people have slip ups once in a while, hell I know I have, but that doesn’t mean you should ever consciously think, “Hey, I could do without condoms, it’s not like a baby will be created, I’m on the pill!”

I have a saying with my friends: “You can get rid of a fetus, but herpes is forever.” Now, I’m not saying just get an abortion and you’re problems will go away. But I am saying that we should be more concerned about life threatening viruses and irritating/embarrassing/painful STI’s. After all, if you ever slip up, there’s always Plan B. There’s no Plan B for herpes.

So basically, I am preaching that you should always use condoms. Even when you are casually seeing someone, and he/she swears you’re the only one that shares their bed. Them swearing that doesn’t mean jack shit. Nothing is more important than your health. You never know if they slip up and sleep with someone and won’t tell you, or if they’re just an outright ass and are sleeping with anything with a pretty face.

However, when you are in a committed relationship, a relationship that you’ve been in a while, and both parties have been tested, I think it’s okay to let your guard down and rely solely on the pill/patch/IUD or whatever form of female birth control you wish to use. But bare in mind, you are still taking a risk.

Take HPV for instance, even if your boyfriend thinks with all his heart that he doesn’t have it and that he won’t infect you, remember, males can’t be tested for. So you are basically taking a gamble with your health.

HPV is a virus that can either cause cervical cancer or genital warts. There’s a chance many of us will have it sometime during our lives. If our immune system is strong enough, our bodies will push out the virus before it ever turns into cervical cancer or genital warts. We’ve all seen the commercials; if we had the 3 Gardisil shots when we were teenagers, we should be protected from 4 of the most common strains of HPV. But there are hundreds of HPV strains. So just know that even if you trust your S.O. completely, there’s still a minimal risk.